Micro bikinis are very, very small versions of the bikini. They leave little to the imagination of those who can see it because it covers a bare minimum of the wearer’s body. Perhaps not even covering anything at all. The top and bottom of the bikini only covers the most sensitive part of the woman’s body. It barely covers the nipples, the buttocks and the crotch of the wearer. Similarly related to the g-string bikinis in terms of appearance, most micro-bikinis are made of string and very small pieces of cloth—usually triangular and teardrop shaped—which covers the nipples, the crotch and the buttocks. The aim is to conceal only the most erotic of women’s zones and nothing more.

Not only because of its very provocative form is the micro bikini only for a select few of the women’s population. The micro bikini is made only for those who are blessed in terms of physical assets. As the size and shape of this type of bikini is made with showing off the body in mind—only those who are daring enough to show what they have can wear the micro bikini.

The micro bikini is made for those who are utterly confident with their bodies as it exposes pretty much every nook and cranny of a woman’s sensuality. It is perfect for summer getaways in daring summer locations. This is made for those women who love to show off their curves and assets with the intention of getting a very even tan with minimal tan lines.

Apart from the physical demands of the micro bikini, the micro bikini also demands that the wearer get a bikini wax—a Brazilian wax, perhaps—in order to remove the hair in the pubic region so as to add to more appeal from the wearer. The woman would not obviously want hair from the nether region to be all over the place while she is wearing this provocative attire.

While the tankini and the one piece bathing suit suits pretty much every shape and size, the micro bikini is not for everyone. Such types of clothing have aroused several controversies as the micro bikini is next to being nude. As such, the micro bikini is banned from wholesome beaches where the aim is to keep the family atmosphere. This is because the micro bikini is very sexually suggestive, if not overtly sexual.

The micro bikini is only for those who are very liberated. Because the prospect of showing off all of your assets is not far from micro bikinis. And there is in fact nothing left for conservatism with this type of fashion. If you prefer the maximum of sex appeal with the minimum of coverage, then the micro bikini is definitely for you. Sensual and inviting, the micro bikini is something a women can wear outdoors and indoors—in private places if only to excite the imagination of your partner, if you know what we mean.

Cover-ups also offer an escape from the sun which is becoming more important as the suns rays are intensifying. When packing up for the beach, don’t forget to bring plenty of water and a cover-up so that you avoid dehydration and burning. Intermittent bouts of sun should be adhered to during the summer months in order to safeguard your skin. Premature aging does not look pretty. So be smart with the amount of exposure you subject your sensitive skin to.

When buying and wearing a bikini, don’t think of it as a bikini. Think of it as a pair of knickers and a bra. A pair of knickers and a bra that you are about to wear in public and be photographed in.

If you were told that tomorrow you had to go to work in nothing but your pants and the whole thing was to be captured on film, you’d spend a lot of time making sure you had on the most flattering option available. You would think big pants – not pretty little things with tiny weeny strips of material and pretty braids. You would think underwired bras which are the geniuses of lifting, separating and thrusting. Do the same amount of planning for your bikini. Just because your inhibitions have gone it doesn’t mean your cellulite will have.

Obviously you’re not going to spend your entire holiday standing up and admiring yourself in mirrors, so you need to work out what that bikini will look like in action.

1. Push your tummy out. Yes. We knew you were breathing in. But you can’t breathe in for a two-week holiday can you? Now imagine you’ve eaten pasta and ice cream every day and push it out some more. There. Maybe a sarong would be a good idea.

2. Turn away from the mirror and imagine picking up an object from the floor. Pause and look back mid-action. What does your behind look like? Is there anything showing that might frighten small children?

3. Wave frantically at an imaginary friend in the surf. Does anything pop out? Or flop out?

4. Jump up and down and pretend to play volleyball.

5. Lie on your back and writhe around on the floor as if you were snogging a fabulous holiday lover on a sun lounger. Check out the mirror to see how you look mid-wriggle.

6. Avoid novelty clasps. Men are simple creatures. Your bikini should be, too. He will be easily confused if presented with anything marginally more complex than a bra clasp. Pop your head out of the changing room curtain and if there’s a good-looking man around you can always invite him in to see what he thinks.

7. Beware of details like beading. They may look fabulous, but they can get caught on people, sun beds, seaweed or sea creatures. Models have beading on their swimsuits all the time, but they’re usually travelling with an entourage and working with a highly trained team from Vogue who can look out and check for dangers. Try it. Writhe around on the carpet and see if bits of your bikini get stuck to it. If you’re in a department store with a fish counter maybe pop down in your bikini and ask if you can practise brushing against the sea creatures in your cozzie and see if anything gets caught. Emerging from the sea with the entire cast of Finding Nemo clinging to your rear is not a good look.

8. Think of the tan lines. Even if a bikini is fabulous and you look really hot in it, stay clear if it’s got odd cutaway holes and weird straps and things. You might look good in it on holiday but it’s not practical to keep wearing the bikini in the office when you get home.

9. Throwing water over yourself will probably be frowned upon, even in the most understanding of department stores, but we do suggest that before taking your bikini on holiday you do a little extra research at home. Lie down in the bath and then quickly stand up in your bikini – does it fall down to your knees when wet? If you’re flat-chested and have gone for heavy padding, do the all-important lumps of material stay in place?

10. What will it look like when you emerge from the surf? Jump around in it a bit when it’s wet. Does it still hold in everything it was meant to hold in? Does it go see-through? Are you going to need extra waxing to wear this?

There are a lot of things to think about but don’t get paranoid and depressed about bikini purchasing. Nobody looks good in a bikini and those model pictures are all airbrushed anyway.

Alternatively, you could just go skiing instead.

Red’s a bit of a Renaissance man, who has taken his experiences in competitive swimming, high fashion, and entertainment, and channeled them into a very exciting line of swimwear fashions that express the true flavor of life in South Beach, Florida.

In fact, Red is as unique as any of his designs, so who wouldn’t want to talk to a man who bills himself as the “Austin Powers of the bikini business”? We certainly did, and we hope you enjoy reading this interview as much as we enjoyed talking with Red.

On With the Interview…

Red, please share a bit of your background with us.

I was born in the OC, in Santa Ana California, and went to College in LA at Otis School of Art and Design. It was like going to school on project runway- intense, competitive and inspiring.

After I graduated, I worked for a host of Companies in LA, including Guess Jeans, Mossimo, Esprit and Oscar de la Renta. I always wanted to have my own collection, but I never knew what I wanted to do or say… and then a light came on.

How did you become interested in designing fashion swimwear?

At first I was very apprehensive about becoming a swimwear designer. I had been working as a sportswear designer for many years, and it took a great friend and mentor of mine, Laurie Allyn, to convince me to accept a job designing swimsuits.

I will never forget our first meeting after she hired me to design a collection. I had been working at Guess Jeans previously and at Guess you have to work very fast because the seasons change so quickly. So, Laurie came down into my office after I had been working there for a week. I had filled all the walls with new sketches and designs, and we spent the afternoon looking everything over. I think she was a little scared at how many ideas I had! We laugh about how much passion it takes to make it in this business, and I am just lucky that she believed in me. Now look at me.

Where do you draw your creative inspiration from?

I’m actually a pop culture junkie. My favorite blog is Pink is the New Blog. I read it everyday to see what is happening and what people are wearing.

I also find inspiration on TRL. The top ten of music inspires me to be original and new. And then… thrift stores… they are a library of our history and I have learned that everything comes back again.

After I collect all of that information, I try to find a specific person, place, or thing to help me draw an influence and a mood and a story. A designer is really a storyteller with fabrics… I am just trying to let everyone have something to say when they wear one of my designs.

How do you define the South Beach look?

Well, the best thing about the South Beach look is that it is so diverse. We have people that travel here and live here from all over the world, so I find a mix of Latin culture, European culture and American culture all over the beach.

I try to draw from the hot sexy weather a sense of peace and passion, because South Beach is a feeling as well as a way to be. There is a sense of freedom here that is not found in many American beach towns, and I try to reflect that freedom in my designs.

What are some of your favorite styles and embellishments?

I love placement prints on a person’s body, I just think that makes a body look so hot. Embroidery is always nice, as long as the pieces feel that they have some authenticity, that maybe that I have traveled somewhere to find the inspiration and turned it into a swimsuit that people ask you about. That’s all I care about. My job is to make people feel that they are sexy from the inside out.

How important is finding the right fit? Any tips you’d care to share?

Each individual person has their own hips, bust, and bum. What I say is, try on as many suits as it takes to find the perfect one. But if the ones that you are finding are not fitting both top and bottom, find a separates rack and go to town. Most people have a different fit on the top than they do on the bottom. You should also remember to take some risks, and try on something different. You never know how it’s going to look until it’s on your bod.

Now, we couldn’t do this interview without asking about your acting career. How about sharing some of your credits with us?

LOL…that is so UNFAIR….

I was a teenager… It was a dark moment in my past… No-one will ever find the tapes… I have purchased them all and burnt them!

Seriously, I gave up acting to become a designer when I went to college. To get through school I worked as a waiter at a 50’s dinner called Fender-Bender. I used to perform an act where I impersonated a chicken to get tips.

My most famous customer was Kevin Costner. His daughter was having a birthday party, and I was the entertainment. After that humiliating experience, I decided nothing could make me go back to acting again.

Anything looming on the horizon?

I am currently working on my Summer Collection. Don’t be surprised if I start making some sportswear. I love the bikinis, but I believe that South Beach is a total lifestyle.
Thanks for talking with us today Red. Is there anything else you’d like to add?

Please buy my stuff…so I don’t have to go back to impersonating a chicken!

Any woman that complains of being fat, having menopause, or does any type of whining about anything pertaining to their body that doesn’t have some sort of weight gaining disease or metabolism deficiency has absolutely zero excuse from this point forward to not at least try to look good.

Wow.  These women are a true blessing.

She’s in better shape than your daughter

Menopause Rules

Metamucil!

Fiber One!

The Golden Girls

Fried Green Tomatoes!

Mary Poppins!

Best Side Boob Ever

50

-Lady N

Preparing for the Waxing Experience

Step 1
Get recommendations from friends and family. If possible, try to get recommendations from women who are similar in age. When our skin ages, it loses elasticity and must be treated somewhat differently when waxed.

Step 2
Research the salons and estheticians in your area.

Step 3
Research what the salon considers a bikini wax. Generally, a bikini wax will remove hair at or around the area covered by a bikini bottom, allowing you to wear an average swimsuit with confidence. More extreme waxing processes, like the Brazilian, will remove all the hair. Some salons, and some estheticians, don’t offer these.

Step 4
Research the kinds of wax the salons use. A lot of salons use soy wax, which is gentle on the skin, but not an option if you have a soy allergy.

Step 5
Get something else waxed prior to setting up the bikini wax, if you can. Women have differing tolerances to the pain associated with waxing. If having your upper lip or lower legs waxed leaves you in agony, you might not be ready for a bikini wax (although some women say having their legs waxed hurts more than the bikini area).

Step 6
Grow the hair to ¼ inch. But, trim hair that is too long. You can trim it to about ¼ inch as well. It is necessary to have at least ¼ inch for the wax to grab the hair, but it also helps for the hair not to be too long. The longer the hair, the more likely it can get matted with the wax. It does tend to be less painful when the hair has been trimmed back somewhat.

Step 7
Schedule the appointment for a time when you do not have your menstrual period, it can be more painful then. Some salons won’t do a wax during a client’s menstrual period for health reasons.

Step 8
Take 400 mg of ibuprofen before the visit.

Step 9
Wear some cotton underwear that you won’t mind parting with. Your esthetician will be quite skilled at applying the wax, and the wax will most likely be thick enough that it won’t run. But you might want to wear an older, non-frilly pair just in case some wax does get on them.

Step 10
Shower shortly before the waxing, if possible. Wax will adhere better to clean, dry skin. Showering will wash away any dirt or dead skin cells that could cause blemishes if any wax gets trapped in the pores.

Step 11
Use an astringent on the area to be waxed shortly beforehand, if possible. Drying out the hair slightly can help the wax adhere to the hair better and make the waxing more productive.

The Waxing

Step 1
Relax. For most women, a bikini wax is nowhere near as painful as they expect it to be.

Step 2
Tell the esthetician what you are looking for.

Step 3
Strike up a conversation with the esthetician. Distraction can help you relax and make the process more comfortable.

Step 4
Be prepared for the esthetician to ask you to remove your pants or skirt. You will leave your underwear on for a basic bikini wax. The esthetician will just ask you to slide it out of the way as necessary.

Step 5
Lay back, relax, and let the esthetician do the rest. The wax will be warm, but not too hot. The esthetician shouldn’t apply too much wax at one time. Then a fabric strip will be placed over the wax and removed in the direction of the hair growth. You will feel it as it is removed. Don’t be embarrassed to ask the esthetician to stop if it is too painful. But don’t be surprised if you do still get charged for at least half a wax. Once the waxing is done, your esthetician will apply a cream to soothe your skin.